it's been almost 2 years since my friend molly died. i think about her almost every day. you can get a small sense of how compelling she was from the picture above. and truly i feel her spirit with me all the time.
i sometimes wonder how she could be so spectacularly beautiful and talented and so humble. she was a great potter and i can see some of her pottery near me as i type. i once met her high school ceramics teacher and talked about molly with her. she was a small older woman but had an imposing personality, i could tell. i don't think she gave compliments out easily. when i brought up molly with her she spoke with fondness and she said she had been one of her best students. later, i told molly about this and she was genuinely surprised. she smiled and she blushed.
i have another memory of molly which used to make me sad but not anymore. one late afternoon she pulled up to my house. i felt flustered at the time because the place was a mess, i felt kind of gross and unshowered (hey, this is a real life story!), and the truth was she was a little mythical to me in life. that sounds goofy, but it's true. she had no idea i felt this way and i'm sure our mutual friends would laugh to hear me say that. she had a great sense of style, she was beautiful, she was utterly down-to-earth. anyway, we sat on my front step and it was one of those perfect summer nights, warm but breezy. you could hear the little league game across the street. she took my weirdness and self-consciousness in stride and we just sat and talked. she was completely accepting and i can feel myself back on that step in my mind. i'm happy for having that moment with her. and it reminds me to loosen up and not let insecurity get in the way of those times in life that mean most.
and one more- once when molly came into the coffee shop i worked at i stood at the counter opposite her with that amazing smile on her face and i felt an overwhelming need to give her something. i'd just made a bracelet i was wearing and i took it off and gave it to her. i told her i just really wanted her to have it. i'm so glad i did that... that maybe in life she knew that i loved her.
i miss you molly.
if you are interested in contributing to a nursing scholarship in her memory through her sister's roller derby team you can read more about it here and follow the link to donate. i would so appreciate it. thank you.