Tuesday, September 10, 2013

2 deer

i watched 2 deer in the field outside my kitchen window this morning.  a calm came over me.  those are the moments it feels everything will be ok.   

i think of the book "the hidden life of deer".  i also think of the time i hit a deer with my car at almost midnight on the highway.  i was driving the exploder which, incidentally, i just sold for parts this weekend.  a car is just a hunk of metal but i drove it for close to 10 years and a lot can happen in 10 years.  so it's also a vehicle (punny) for memories.

hitting that deer was a turning point in my life.  maybe this is what would be a called a mild case of ptsd in common terms.  the event really hit me in my heart.  the physical and tactile experience is still so present for me...the feel of the night air and the fur of the animal, as if i had actually touched it.


Anonymous said...

I understand that feeling. I ran over a baby opossum once many years ago, to this day the sight of one breaks my heart. <3

No Carnations said...

I think that its a sign of coming full circle. Watching the deer now and remembering the life lost before. A turning point as you say in the last ten years.

The fact that you can connect these things in such a meaningful way as above, well it seems to me you are in a good place. Better than you think and on many levels.